I want to be Baron Kellett

Shouldn't there be a duck on that?

I, for one, welcome our new Baron Kellett overlord.

Hmm, you know, something very similar to this was the plot of last week's episode of Leverage (http://www.tv.com/leverage/the-king-george-job/ep isode/1352883/summary.html?tag=ep_guide;summary)

Except it didn't involve a webcartoonist, Anne Hathaway, or Dame Edna.

That's Baronet. You would be a Baronet, not a Baron. Sorry. But you would still be called Sir Dave. And you would still outrank Sir Paul and Sir Mick. Just sayin'.

That's right. Barons are styled Lord (or, indeed, Baron, if clarity is needed).

Dave, is there the remotest possibility that you're related to the first Baronet Kellett? (The numbers refer to the order in which they held the title, if that wasn't clear...)

As an Irishman and a lover of all things Kellet I give you my word and my blade that I will strive to make this happen with every fibre of my being.

So how do we get started my liege? I'd imagine there's some eccentric group of Anglo-Irish in Cork who would be interested in your claim to glory. I suppose the archives might show your ancestry right?

What a delightful turn of events, but I do agree the family crest needs to have a duck (at least). We will be happy to do anything to help. Maybe a letter writing compain? I would enjoy SHELDON taking a trip to the emerald isle and being given a title.
Best of luck
(i am serious about the letters)

Wouldn't it just be easier to re-edit the Wikipedia page? ;)

eh, Anne Hathaway? How 'bout Amy Adams!

She's much better.

....are those pigs on the shield? Seriously, pigs?

Them's is wild boars on that shield and they ain't exactly wussies. You want pork chops from those old boys and you are likely to end up the one laid out on a table somewhere...

Be sure to give our best to the viscount St. Austell-in-the-Moor, Biggleswade-Brixham.

Despite what some will say, it is not possible to buy a British Title and have it legally.

There are Feudal Scottish Baron titles that can be legally purchased, but they tend to be quite expensive.

I looked into buying myself a title a few years ago and thought the 700.00 USD price was reasonable for the "legal" ability to be known as the "Rgt Hon Sir Andrew Petersen." But I did some research with contacts in Britain, and discovered that the sale of British Titles are not legitimate.

The baronetage doesn't exist if the Republic declared all titles nul, but people are still referred to by some of those titles so I would assume you'd only have to prove that you are that family's senior male member. Seems to me you have a father still living and he might have something to say. Oh - and Irish records are pretty scatty partly due to a fire during the Rising so proof might be difficult. Still, I wish you luck with it.

All kidding aside, it is actually illegal for American citizens to receive titles of nobility. :(

Oh yes, I'd forgotten about that... but isn't there something about congress being allowed to let individuals accept them, and isn't there some doubt about what "receive" means in this context?